Who knows if this is real-but it is clever!
#1
AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD

> To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before
last.
> Date: 2009-05-27, 1 :43 a.m. E.S.T.
> I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that
I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend,
threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and
earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather
important message.
> First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect
you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took
my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket
for a reason.. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911
.45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster
for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that
it is a very
intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!
> I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come
from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse
walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and
wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your
buddies to come help mug us again].
> After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your
cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and
filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas
station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took
150 gallons and was extremely grateful!
> I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along
with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
> I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that
was
parked at the curb .... after I broke the windshield and side window and
keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
> Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma
Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a
little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed
to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the
FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
> The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I
guess while he traced your number etc.)..
> ;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I
feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for
your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some
of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you
have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps
reconsider, the career
path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not
be so lucky.Have a good day!
> Thoughtfully yours,
> Alex
Reply
#2
It is pretty clever, but not so sure someone would have done all of that. It does get a point across.
Reply


Possibly Related Threads…
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Real Dumbasses! Mach 1 Club 2 10,370 12-16-2010, 10:04 PM
Last Post: Rare Pony

Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)
[-]
Latest Threads
What's One More Iron In The Fire!
Last Post: fram lee666
03-18-2024 06:21 PM
» Replies: 125
» Views: 238038
"Jacobra"
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
06-30-2023 11:13 PM
» Replies: 86
» Views: 150593
My old Queensland Ambulance
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
06-30-2023 11:08 PM
» Replies: 5
» Views: 1680
New member from San Jose, CA
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
05-09-2023 08:39 AM
» Replies: 12
» Views: 3953
Saving Seatbelts
Last Post: Jim
02-19-2023 10:23 PM
» Replies: 2
» Views: 9108
Sourcing new wheels
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
01-25-2023 02:34 PM
» Replies: 1
» Views: 1993
Shaker Air Filter
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
01-08-2023 02:24 AM
» Replies: 3
» Views: 1465
1971 Mach 1 parting out interior parts -...
Last Post: ylwhrse
12-22-2022 01:38 PM
» Replies: 0
» Views: 640
Painting
Last Post: Rare Pony
12-14-2022 06:24 PM
» Replies: 2
» Views: 1964
WELCOME ALL NEW MEMBERS INTRODUCE YOURSE...
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
08-31-2022 01:36 PM
» Replies: 82
» Views: 156997
1970 mach 1 matching numbers
Last Post: Kstweeter
08-31-2022 10:31 AM
» Replies: 1
» Views: 1086
Brake booster/servo hose length
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
08-23-2022 09:40 AM
» Replies: 7
» Views: 2992
New Member
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
08-20-2022 11:18 AM
» Replies: 2
» Views: 1497
smooth window operation on 70 Mach
Last Post: CUSTOMMISER
08-15-2022 12:10 PM
» Replies: 2
» Views: 1470
Blinkers on solid
Last Post: busted21
08-09-2022 03:58 AM
» Replies: 14
» Views: 8682
Blinkers on solid when lights on.
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
08-08-2022 12:06 PM
» Replies: 1
» Views: 1719
351 cj running hot
Last Post: busted21
08-08-2022 12:13 AM
» Replies: 5
» Views: 3403
Major Winter projects
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
07-09-2022 05:12 AM
» Replies: 49
» Views: 21114
Happy Fathers Day!!!
Last Post: JTS71 Mach1
06-20-2022 02:34 AM
» Replies: 0
» Views: 1681
1969 Raven Black 390 Looking For
Last Post: mason1958
06-11-2022 09:48 AM
» Replies: 10
» Views: 15078

>